The Hungry Hungry Caterpillar Takes over the World
by theWarriorandI
Summary: Did you know that caterpillars have an extremely painful sting? I didn't until a few days ago, this was what crossed my mind as I was reeling in pain.


One day the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar was joyfully eating away with his best friend in the whole word Fat Ass McFucker. Today they had gone a bit too far out on the branches of a tree they had been munching on all night. The leaves were just so good they couldn't believe it or get enough in their bellies. They began to get a bit too close to the end of the branch when the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar suggested it was time they head a bit closer to the safety of the inner branches before a bird or something came by. Just as they began their climb up the branches something huge swept through the trees. They were immediately jarred from the leave and landed on this great force. They were all of a sudden exposed in the harsh sun on top of some moving object, it was definitely an animal but it had no fur just this soft material that gave them something to cling on to, the rest of the terrain was dark and slippery. Hungry Hungry Caterpillar shouted over to his friend who he could see above him clinging on for dear life just as he was. They decided to wait it out just clinging on hoping this animal would stop near a tree or perhaps drive through one again, in which case they could with some effort jump off and return to safety. Eventually the animal began to slow and came to a stop. Then they heard it speak to another animal. It seemed the animals were atop something called a bicycle and were traveling someplace called beer. The caterpillars waited for any sign of them stopping but to no avail. Fat Ass McFucker had the idea if they poked the animal a bit then maybe it would notice them and kindly put them down. He noted that they animals being so large probably had no idea that they were even on their backs.

So Fat Ass McFucker crawled up on the animal's shoulder to get as close to the animals ear as possible so they could be noticed. Fat Ass McFucker just gave one little poke, this was a huge mistake the poke made the animal stop in its tracks and begin to scream, the animal immediately reached back and smashed Fat Ass McFucker completely annihilating him and smearing his entire body including his guts all down the animals arm. The Hungry Hungry Caterpillar immediately jumped from the animal not caring what would happen on the impact down. Thankfully it was not as far down as they originally thought and it helped they were no longer moving. Quickly the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar raced to hide in some grass next to a large gray tower, terrified that the animals would come after him next. This ferocious animal seemed to be in great pain. As Hungry Hungry Caterpillar watched, he was shocked at how much the animal was screaming from the pain of his best friends guts. The animals then went down to inspect his friend not even knowing what had poked them, they carefully looked and saw it was a caterpillar. They quickly pulled out some glowing device asked it if caterpillars were poisonous. From the information they gathered the large animals could be in intense pain for over 5 hours, and not only their sting was venomous, their entire bodies of tiny spikes contained venom. The animal that Fat Ass McFucker bit was in so much pain it couldn't move and was on the verge of emptying it's stomach. Forever seemed to pass buy, the animals were still trying to scramble to make the pain go away but to no avail. Finally the called for help and soon a large motorized device came and took them away.

His head spinning from the traumatic events that day the Hungry Hungry caterpillar crawled over to the nearest tree and went and hid safely in the thickest part of the branches. As he lay there grief overtook him. His best friend in the whole world had been murdered by these gross animals. How would he continue in his life? Overtook with heartbreak a dark cloud crossed over his heart, he must get revenge.

He realized the power that caterpillars had over these large animals that ran the planet. Then the best idea came into his head, world domination.

He pondered the idea, he figured he could easily rally an army of caterpillars. After all, he was well respected in the caterpillar community. Then he thought, no he needed to be large. He had to be able to tower over the human form if he was going to strike fear into them, the large animals called humans had poison that was effective against caterpillars at that size. He needed his army large and strong to be able to withstand any assault from these humans. He remembered one time he ate a bunch of delicious plants by a laboratory that did genetic modification. Yes, he would start there. He put on a green beret, decided to go by General H.H.C, then headed off on his quest.

He found the laboratory that had A-C-M-E written in huge letters across the top. He found his way in carefully as it was the middle of the night and night predators were much more deadly than they ones of the day. Once inside he crawled carefully up a table where he could hear voices. He saw a large cage and it in were two white looking creatures, mice he believed they were called, they were talking in hushed tones something about a hippopotamus wearing a thong. General H.H.C. was very confused then figured it was safe to approach these creatures as they were in a cage. He got a closer look and saw one was a taller more thin mouse and the other was shorter with a rather large head. The taller one then asked "So what are we going to do tonight Brain?" then he heard the response, "Same thing we do every night Pinky, try and take over the world!". General H.H.C. was delighted to hear this, maybe they could help his endeavors against these vicious animals that were now in power. He slowly came into full view of the mice. They stopped talking and all looked at each other, then General H.H.C. spoke first. "So you want to take over the world?" The Brain responded "Yes, we have been trying for years to no avail". General H.H.C. said "So do I, and I have a plan that will work." Extremely interested the Brain sat down and listened carefully to General H.H.C.'s plan. The Brain leaned back when he was done talking, the stood up and started pacing. The Brain returned and said, "Yes, this is brilliant! I have built a machine that can make you grow twice the size of a human. It didn't last more than a day but I can tweak it so the effects will hold, then we will have plenty of time to take control of the world!" Excited by this General H.H.C. knew he would be able to fill the shoes of a proper world leader and rid the planet of these barbaric animals.

The first part of the plan was for General H.H.C. to go out and rally an army of caterpillars. He immediately set out, this would be the most time consuming of the process. While General H.H.C. was out gathering an army, the Brain would stay in the lab and work on building the Enormerator that would make them all grow larger than a human. They figured about 500 caterpillars would be enough. For this he had to travel in a 40 mile radius from the laboratory. For a caterpillar this is a very large distance, however he still succeeded and returned with 1,000 caterpillars ready for battle. Upon returning the Enormerator was just completed. "Perfect timing" the Brain remarked as he saw General H.H.C. approach. That very night they plugged the Enormerator into the largest power source they could find nearby. They switched the machine on and one by one grew a massive army. Finally they grew themselves and set out for battle. Being large now they figured one sting would by them at least 10 hours of the humans being incapacitated. Plenty of time to round them up and take over. They set out sweeping across the cities, stinging and smashing buildings as they passed. Their army was terrifying . Just as planned they were able to infiltrate the Army, Navy, and Air Force along with the main seats of government. Imprisoning the terrified humans and stinging the braver ones. By the time the sun was rising the next morning, they had done it, they had taken over all of these terrible humans that had killed his best friend. General H.H.C. went into a back room of the humans main seat of power, then sat and contemplated how he felt. He was still sad that his friend had died. No matter how many humans he stung or how much power he now had, he was still sad and at this point extremely hungry. He figured with the power he could now get all the food he wanted so he had his army bring him piles and piles of food. Still after eating, he felt sad. He retreated once more into the large building, He walked out the back and found a beautiful porch and laid in the grass. The Brain approached him and asked "Whatever is the matter? Aren't you ecstatic the plan worked and we have taken over the world?" General H.H.C. replied "No, I still have an empty dark hole in my heart where my friend was, Brain, you go ahead and run the world. I think I am done with world domination." The Brain readily agreed and ran off to run the world.

Sad and alone, the Hungry Hungry Caterpillar took off his General's hat and began to wrap himself in a beautiful silk pouch. He hated the world and he hated himself for allowing his anger against these humans to cause such destruction. He finished wrapping himself then drifted off to sleep. What felt like 20 years of disturbed dreams he finally woke. He was so squished against the sack, he squeezed himself out. He stretched his new wings out to full length and fluttered them in the cool breeze, he was once again the size of a leave and was sitting atop a branch swaying in the wind. He fluttered off into the sky.

As it turns out the Enormerator could only keep the small creatures enormous for about two days. After which they all shrank and had to run into hiding as humans were now aware of caterpillars venom and everyone was put on guard for them. Pinky and the Brain too returned back to their laboratory cage where they were well fed, and night after night continued to plot world domination. The Hungry Hungry caterpillar, now a glorious creature, fluttered from beautiful flower to flower scattering the ashes of his best friend on the most beautiful places he could find as a memorial. Then so the world wouldn't forget, each place he went he left little plaques that had his dear friend's full name engraved: Fat Motherfucking Asswipe Shitterson Fuckerton McFucker.


End file.
